California, US: Gopalan appeared before magistrates this afternoon after he was arrested at his home in a dawn raid by Police and RSPCA officers.
He pled guilty to eight hundred and ninety two specimen charges of unlawful sex with animals, after it was revealed he had been interfering with poultry in a series of famous turkey farms.
In court, despite being asked repeatedly to keep his remarks to "guilty or not guilty" Mr Gopalan alleged inter-species discrimination with, "If it's good enough for the gander, why shouldn't it be good enough for me!?"
A spokesman for the RSPCA said, "We are glad Mr Gopalan has finally been apprehended. We don't understand how anyone could... treat a turkey this way. Perhaps the occasional gobble, but not this."
The turkey, be it the victim or Gopalan, wasn't available for comment though it is suspected that this is Gopalan's way of contributing to the off-season decline in sales of Turkeys, and perhaps, deemed to be a remedy for a receding hairline and early signs of dementia.
And we all know that the above is a hoax, and that the number of hits this post has attracted is not due to the popularity of this site or its author, but the similitude between the named in the title and a certain someone who recently released a hoax on Lee's medical condition(see 'hits' below). So if the aforementioned namesake found that the whole furore over his recent hoax was gratifying, it shouldn't be. And, by the way, I didn't say 'Gopalan Nair', just 'Gopalan'. The sensational requires nothing but the merest allusion to the prominent for attention, and is not reliant on the prominence of the site or person who forwards it. Besides the above being an illustration of this point, it also serves to show that it isn't very nice to take jibes at others' infirmities or poke fun at that them just for 'a joke' - as Gopalan recently did with Lee's 'false teeth' falling into the River Thames. A2ed is not a fan of the Lees, but we ought to just stick to the issues instead of just engaging in malicious mud-slinging for its own sake.
the above is a modified version of the original: The Spoof